HAPPY CHANUKAH!! On second thought should I write Hanukkah? Maybe Hanukah? OR alternatively… Hannukah, Chanuka, Hanuka, Channukah, Chanukka, Hanukka, Hannuka, Hannukkah? Another option: Channukkah. That’s some cockamamie spelling. You think? For the record, CHANUKAH looks the right-est to me. We can agree to disagree. As far as Christmas goes (Xmas anyone?), we were not […]
OY, DO I NEED TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU? Read More »
As my 50th high school reunion was rapidly approaching I reluctantly read through the enthusiastic posts on the Facebook group thingy. “I’m counting down the days!”, “oooh can’t wait!”, “sounds like so much fun!”, “send your money in now!”. You want me to go to a FIFTIETH reunion? You can’t make me. Who do these people think
WHO INVITED THE OLD PEOPLE TO MY REUNION? Read More »
It’s National Breast Cancer Awareness Month! I’ve been aware of breasts ever since I eyeballed those beauties in my cousins’ Playboy magazines. Fascinating and mystifying to young me…. when are they arriving? Lively and full of pep when they eventually made their first appearance. Frolicsome and spirited upon full arrival. Gently sloping, wiggly, jiggly and
THE EVOLUTION OF MY BAZOOMS Read More »
No lace, zero doodads, no shiny doohickeys, not a single pouf… Simple, simple, SIMPLE. That is what I announced as I headed into David’s Bridal along with my wedding frock wing-woman. My mom. The sales lady tried to keep her irritation hidden, but I could see what she was thinking, “you have got to be
WHOLLY MOLY MATRIMONY Read More »
A cool breeze flows through the open window. It wafts throughout the interior of the room as sultry rhythms make love to my ears. The seductive setting brings to light all the years and years of accumulated memories; provocative, familiar and abundant. Taking stock of the excess mementos, I tenderly put aside a few favored
I bellied up to the bar, leaned in toward my favorite bartender and ordered an old-fashioned, a Kamikaze, a Bazooka Joe and for good measure… a Jägerbomb. Thanks Coach. I’m hanging with Cliff, Woody, Sam and Diane. There’s Norm in his usual spot. Lillith and Carla just arriving. All us regulars. Then I pipe up,
WHO NEEDS SIX FLAGS WHEN YOU HAVE A TILT-A-WHIRL IN YOUR HEAD Read More »
… and an opera singer, a detective, a novelist, an FBI agent, a tap dancer, a spy. Or so he told countless people he came in contact with over the years. He had a wicked sense of humor and loved to schmooze. He certainly had a way with waitresses and all my girlfriends. Yes, he
MY DAD WAS A FLAMENCO DANCER Read More »
I was birthed from a giggling mother. With that being said, I don’t believe there was much laughter during the actual birth … as my mom was hypnotized. So unless she was given that particular command, while spellbound, my educated guess is that she was in some dreamy, sublime state of being. The giggles most
MOM TURNED UPSIDE DOWN SPELLS WOW Read More »
I entered the workplace at a young age – my first job had few requirements and a stipend of Milky Way bars and Bazooka bubble gum. Observing managerial styles, the secretarial pool or the need to make it up as I went along offered up a variety of skill-sets, experience and useful know-how. All gained
WHAT I HAVE ARE A PARTICULAR SET OF SKILLS Read More »
Lipid defense oil glides over the length and breadth of my face as I cling to hope that all contaminants and impurities will be swept away. Next comes the mineral essence gently pressed onto my skin – it professes to provide essential hydration – followed by upward swoops of copious amounts of radiance serum and antioxidant soft
ONE SERUM AWAY FROM A GOOD MOOD Read More »
