THEY LOVED ME..but only in my mind

Beyond the geographically desirable (and seemingly attainable) boys I wrote about in my diary – there were others I yearned for. And by others… I mean the fellas written up in Tiger Beat magazine.

While glimpsing them on television, oogling their photos taped to my bedroom walls and replaying their albums, I dreamt about meeting them, marrying them and wrote letters expressing my undying love.

It was a Sunday night in 1964, watching the Ed Sullivan Show, when I first laid eyes on the Beatles and subsequently developed strong feelings for John Lennon.

As an official member of a Beatles Fan Club, we each got to choose “our” Beatle. I could tell you I picked John because I respected his songwriting skills or political leanings. Or that I thought he was the cutest Beatle. Nope. I chose John because I thought he was attainable.

Everybody loved Paul (come on, he was the cutest) so I thought my chances of marrying him were pretty slim. But John… a definite possibility.

Then there was sensitive, handsome intern Dr. James Kildare. I saw him weekly.

While others pursued macho Dr. Ben Casey, Dr. Kildare set my heart on fire. Much as I adored Dr K., it might have been a toss up as to who was more within reach. Hence I did betray Dr. Kildare by wearing my Dr. Casey blouse.

Subsequently, I swooped in on charming, badass Napoleon Solo from The Man from U.N.C.L.E.

Heck wasn’t everyone else concentrating their efforts on Illya Kuryakin?

Using that same logic with the Monkees I turned my attention to Micky Dolenz; instead of the obviously unreachable (cuter) Davy Jones. Man, I HAD THIS.

Although not allowed to attend the Monkees Chicago concert back in 1967 (I’m still mad about it) I did manage to spend several hours at the Astor Towers Hotel hoping to get an autograph. There was a moment when Micky and I were only separated by the window of his limousine. And although Samantha was sitting beside him, I was convinced he noticed me.

Pouring my heart out in a typewritten letter, I let him know my love was pure (and not at all because he was a Monkee), for I could see the real Micky beneath the façade of fame. I told him no other girl could love him as much as I did.

I PROPOSED MARRIAGE IN THIS LETTER.

Years later while savoring each page of a scrapbook crafted by my mom – filled with treasured family photos, memorabilia related to high school high jinx, career highlights and lovely anecdotes and poems written by friends – imagine my surprise in coming face-to-face with that original letter…

a letter she never SENT!!

Oh what could have been…

~ Tiger Beat image via Pinterest